Due to this current economic debacle, hipsterism is at an all time high. Resist the temptation of listening to Of Montreal. Do not fall victim to the faux hawk. In order to further dissuade you from this shadowy path of dark-rimmed glasses, I have decided to provide for you a brief description of my once-friend Tommy Tucket:
As far as hipsters go, Tommy was a class act. He wore tight jeans. His favorite shirt was the one that said “Hungry Man Dinner,” though it was a close tie with his Orange Julius tee-shirt that he had converted to a vest and his “I Heart Hot girls” tee-shirt that he had bought the day that he had met Clementine, his girlfriend. He had a fixed gear bike, or fixie, as the twitter babies would say. He wore dark rim glasses. He ignored his copious education, which consisted of a Bachelors from Haverford and a Masters in cultural studies from Stanford. He smoked cigarettes--American Spirits. He had a cat named Señor Pretty, on which he had placed a little sombrero. He felt the compulsion to run to the swing set anytime he saw a playground. He had seven tee-shirts that Clementine had made for him which said things like “Abort Sarah Palin.” He wore, for several months, a faux hawk. And finally, he had once gone out to get a sandwich with Pabst Blue Ribbon boxes for shoes.
Sincerely,
thinkingfrog, defender of the meek
Note: photo from www.latfh.com
